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More of me 2

13 Apr

In my first post about me, I wrote at length about my medical history. Now it’s time for the rest of me!

My husband and I are from pretty large families. I have three older siblings and my parents are still together after almost 50 years. My grandparents were together for over 60 years before my grandfather passed away. Two of my siblings are married, the third is still single.

I grew up as the only girl in the family, the youngest of the siblings. I was definitely attached to my mother and I cried very easily. My brothers were pretty mean to me for the most part, but I suspect that is really pretty normal for siblings. I had few friends, and I spent most of my time alone either reading or writing. I was the kid that got picked on in school and I had my share of bullies. I can’t say it was a perfect childhood, but somehow I don’t think it was too much different from what most kids were living at that time. I don’t recall much major trauma growing up, but I was a “stuffer.” I stuffed down my feelings and hid everything. I think it came from being the youngest and only girl, I felt like an outsider much of the time.

At fourteen, I got my first job and my first taste of independence. I was hooked, and from there on, I had a job. I even figured out how to adjust my schedule at school as a junior so that I was only in school part of the day and at work the rest of the day. In college, I worked part-time at a few computer jobs while I was in school full-time. And only two years into college, I flip-flopped and began working full-time and going to school part-time. The point behind this part of my history is that I worked as soon as I was legally able, so when I got sick it was the first time in 15 years (half my life!) that I no longer had a job. It was terrifying for me, because I was accustomed to being in control of my life and my finances for so long…and then it was gone. And so was my health suddenly gone.

My husband and I married in 1999 after knowing each other for 8 years. In 2002, we adopted our first dog, at a time when I was still not working outside the home. Our first dog had…issues. But we loved her to no end for 9 1/2 years, until she got sick (without potential for recovery), and we had to let her go to the Bridge. Shortly after that, my husband and I moved into a brand new house closer to family. At the end of 2011, we adopted our current dog, who has her own weird issues! But as with the first, we love her very much.

In 2001, I published my first book. Over the last 12 years, I’ve had the opportunity to publish ten more. I had always been involved in writing in different ways–poetry, short stories, books–but didn’t set myself to publishing until I was released from my job due to my prolonged illness. Writing was not only a distraction, it was a world for me. It was a whole new life separate from my original computer-related career, and it kept me sane during the long hours of being ensconced in illness.

There it is, highlights of me. At least for now.

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Posted by on April 13, 2013 in about me, anxiety, history

 

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